Life in 140 Characters Or Less

“Here: Take my debit card. Do you have some paper? A pen? Because I can write down the password for you. And there’s an ATM right around the corner.”

—Me during a run to would-be robber who wants my new Apple watch I bought for it’s GPS/pacing capabilities. Little does would-be robber know that since I bought the watch, my wrist is more valuable than my checking account.

Life In 140 Characters Or Less

“They’re all the same. Just hurry up and pick one.” #SuperLottoPlus #NotGonnaWinAnyway

                                                          -Me, to the person in front of the Chevron Mini Mart line who’s staring at lottery tickets the way I stare at a bakery case.